“Yo ZUN, I-I’m really happy for you, I’ma let you finish, but Raizing made one of the best shooting games of all time. One of the best shooting games of all time!”

I was debating between watching more anime or playing Garegga. I think I made the right choice.

Miyamoto-B may not have Golden Bat’s piercing shots, but he does have the splash shots and adequate speed (by “adequate” I mean controllable, not HOLY FUCK THIS IS THE JUDGE SPEAR OF RAIZING SHOOTERS like Miyamoto-C) needed to scoop up them 10,000-point medals. I was able to maintain two 10k chains: from end of stage 2 to halfway through stage 3 (shortly before I accidentally the tank and by extension my extend), and from the aircraft carriers in stage 5 to where I died (Nose Lavaggin mk2). I think I might start maining him.

hey wait why am i talking about medals i should be learning 2 complete the first five stages. But then again, surviving and cranking out enough points for extends tend to go hand in hand.

Doing that thing with Umihara Kawase DS (Jun SE Kanzenban or some such jibber-jabber).  I’m a fiend for wire action games, and the PSX Umihara is probably the best of them.  The straightforward take on that is the mode I’m playing on the DS port, which also has the SNES original and a remix mode of Shun.

It is not trivial to describe progress in the game, if you haven’t played before.  Winning the game is nothing worth mentioning.  You’ll probably do it within your first hour of play, and you’ll only see a few fields in the process.  Less than 10 of them, out of the almost 50 in the game.

Most fields have multiple exits.  And roughly speaking, the harder the exit is to reach, the harder the stage it takes you to.  The numbering of the fields is a poor indicator of difficulty, and the various paths to clear the game don’t follow anything like a sane order. This map should give some sense.

What all of this means is that you decide how hard you want the game to be.  The easiest clear takes just a few minutes and you’ll never break a sweat.  Clearing via F55?  Beyond mortal ken.

It also means that you have to be fairly familiar with the game to interpret any accomplishment.  To know, for example, that reaching F42 is quite a feat.  I haven’t, by the way.

If you duck into practice mode from the DS menu, it shows all the stages you’ve reached so far, and the paths linking those stages.  There’s also a counter, XX/128 in the Shun SE mode, which I’m guessing is the number of different paths you can unlock.  It’s not the number of fields, because there are only 50-ish of those.  (EDIT: It’s not counting paths either.  See first comment.)

Once you’ve got some mojo working, reaching the deeper stages becomes the real goal, so raising that counter in the Practice menu is probably as good an indicator of progress as any, even if it’s nothing like linear.    And assuming I’m understanding it correctly.  In any case, I’m at 64/128 right now.  I’ve forged a fair bit further on the PSX disc, so I’m still in the scraping off rust phase.

I game-overed on F36, so that’s probably what I’ll work on next.  You can reach it via the alternate exit on either F0 or F7, and then the second exit on F35.  7->14->15 is easier than 0->11->23->14->15, if you’re looking to try it.

Every once in a while you come across a game that shows you the value of having a well-crafted demo. Because the demo manages to mask the flaws in the complete game and as a result your customers end up wasting their money on the full version. Today’s example is Zombie Apocalypse (XBLA/PSN). The game is basically a higher-than-average-budget arena shooter that has you mowing down wave after wave of hungry zombies. Note that this is not intended as a review, rather this is me venting about wasting time with a shit game.

I want to go ahead and get the positives out of the way: it has zombies and lots of ways to kill them; the presentation is quite slick as far as HUD, menus, “modern” HDR bloom graphics, some limited physics and stuff; also the demo was pretty fun and I kind of liked screwing around in co-op multiplayer when I tried it.

Ok there, now that that’s done, let’s get on with why I hate this game (and trust me it takes a lot for me to actually hate a game with zombies). The game is incredibly fucking long. The regular campaign is 55 days, that’s 55 separate levels. Too bad there are only 7 unique arenas. Of course that’s not all, once you get even a couple of weeks into the game, a single level starts to take approximately forever to complete. Most of these levels are fairly poorly designed as well once all of the gimmicks (weapons, zombie types, radioactive zombies) have been revealed. I can’t begin to count the number of times that I’d thin out the zombies and suddenly more would spawn and I’d wish the damn level would just end, already.

The game starts out generously easy, with levels full of zombies from whom you can escape being grabbed and therefore never die and rack up tons of extra lives. Then it gets to frustratingly hard as levels consisting of waves of zombies that take lots of damage and kill you in one hit begin to appear. By waves, I mean spawn the same type of PITA zombie for 5 minutes straight while you try to credit feed your way into more favorable circumstances. Lets not forget my special favorite, the “Granny” zombie that throws knives. Light colored knives that kill you in one hit and travel in an arc and are therefore difficult to determine the path of, and are easily lost sight of in patches of bloom lighting effects.

Obviously the additional weapons help power you up and take out these more threatening zombie types, right? Not quite. The weapons that are spawned seem to be at least semi-random, and there’s nothing quite like accidentally picking up the slow-throwing and difficult-to-aim molotov cocktail when being faced with a wave of exploding kamikaze zombies. The chainsaw melee attacks aren’t much of a backup in that situation. The game actually feels a lot like the first Postal in a lot of ways, but unfortunately the weapon system isn’t one of them. Being able to pick up a lot of different types of weapons through the campaign and then switch between them at will later (depending on ammo availability of course), as well as back to your default melee chainsaw and infinite-ammo submachine gun, would have made a lot of sections much more managable.

Finally, the scoring system is sadistically aimed at people with lots of free time and very large bladders. Leaderboard entries are only saved for games starting from Day 1. Scoring is based heavily on a multiplier that goes up by 1x for every 5 zombies killed, and adds 3x for a zombie killed with a “chainsaw execution” attack that leaves you vulnerable. If you die, the multiplier goes back to 1x. This makes death have a score-ruining effect of around Deathsmiles Mega Black Label level. More forgiving is the 5000 point bonus for zombies killed by being forced into an environmental hazard. Anyone who wants to play straight through all 55 long-ass days of that kind of shit just to get #1 on the SP leaderboard is quite welcome to the honor as far as I’m concerned.

Oh yeah, the boss (there are three boss levels, but it’s all the same thing) is retarded and clearly tacked on. Also, I personally wish harm upon whoever decided that those dumbass flying things could one-shot a character, and have additional ones able to be spawned between player deaths. I’d bitch about the lack of story or the unlockable modes being equally lame, but I’ve wasted enough space on this crap already.

tl;dr – this game has too little content spread too thin and taken as a whole has almost no redeeming qualities as a single-player experience.

So in NetHack, not knowing what a wand of cancellation does, I cast it on myself, thinking it’ll maybe clear up status ailments, or it justs cancels a spell in progress.

Needless to say I accidentally my inventory.

Weapons
a – a +0 quarterstaff (weapon in hands)
u – a crude short sword
H – a crude dagger
Armor
b – an uncursed +0 cloak of magic resistance (being worn)
n – a white-handed shield
q – a +0 helmet called jack shit named SAME SHIT
t – a coarse mantelet
z – a +0 hooded cloak
A – a +0 pair of hard shoes (being worn)
G – a +0 helmet called jack shit (being worn)
Comestibles
f – a tripe ration
o – 2 food rations
Scrolls
i – an uncursed unlabeled scroll
Spellbooks
l – an uncursed plain spellbook
m – an uncursed plain spellbook

Potions
g – an uncursed clear potion
h – an uncursed clear potion
R – an uncursed clear potion

(1 of 2)

I’m not sure how to go on now.

also, Space Invaders Extreme 2. Time Attack is so addicting, and so bad for my scoring at the same time. And I had the damn music stuck in my head all weekend at Yaoi-Con.

after a wave of moodswings, mental breakdowns, furious masturbation, and hours of world of warcraft i’ve been playing things of actual value!

and by actual value I mean “requires more than a pulse per hour”

been playing borderlands–it’s a diablo clone slash fps that does both parts correctly. if hellgate london was half this good it wouldn’t have closed down!

so far, siren and hunter are the only classes worth playing. being an fps, it’s more valuable to kill whatever’s in sight before it can reach you in the first place.

bit on the easy side, though, and by a bit i mean bioshock-grade difficulty. i’ve been doing every quest the game gives me and i’ve yet to find a boss that can’t be defeated solely by sidestepping him or using the vehicle to lock on to him. supposedly there are three difficulty levels (for each 1-32, 34-48, and 48-50) but I haven’t seen any of them yet, not having progressed halfway into the main quest. maybe the game would be hard if I focused only on the main quest, though due to the damage system (50% less damage versus enemies three levels above = no) that wouldn’t seem any bit viable.

Played two runs today. First was S, S (after three retries, gawd), S, S, S, A (two deaths), S. I wasn’t sure if I were good at the game or not anymore. What happened at Mission 2 was utter travesty over and over again. Died at the boss’ last attack, let one of the rocket troopers right before the tunnel escape…uhg.

Second run fared considerably better and resulted in S, S, A, A, S, A, S. All the deaths were pretty stupid. Hit one of those eggs dropped by the ceiling-climbing thing in Mission 2, accidentally jumped up instead of down a platform at the boss, and got hit by a moai ring at Mission 4. Mistimed a jump dodging Mission 6 boss’ orbs and my thumb actually shook a bit while fighting against the blob, causing me to lose two lives there. I might need to revise my tactic there a bit and switch to flamer when it shoots out those homing stars. Must test it in Practice before trying it in play however, in case it’s too close to the boss…it responds rather violently to getting hit with flamer. Or maybe it’d be enough to stand right at the edge of the screen…hmm.

Anyhoo, though the game regards this is as my fourth clear of the game, it’s really my first legitimate clear on a single credit while not using the 30 lives code. So yeah, I’ve 1CCed the game now. Though even that’s a bit of a dubious an accomplishment, as the game gives out permanent extra lives as you accumulate game time and I had already got one of those. Had it not been present, I wouldn’t have got the clear this time.

I’m still longing for that S-rank clear…

Mission 6 was a toughie to S-rank and it’s a fair bet I can’t do it consistently yet. But I’ve done it once, and that’s good enough for now. The boss’ first and the second-to-last forms took the longest to crack, though there’s a stupidly simple way to deal with the blob that seems to work reliably. The boss’ last form is a push-over.

Managed to S-rank Final Boss Battle as well and did it three times in a row so that’s some nice consistency there. That means I’ve S-ranked every single stage in the game. WOO. Just, y’know, not during normal play, only in practice. I dread to think how long that’ll take. After taking care of Final Boss Battle I returned to practice Mission 5 in which I had died during my last two proper runs. In 10 or so runs I didn’t manage to S-rank it once, got 98% most of the time. More often than not I died to Lance who seemed to love to do his “pinball-bounce around the room” -maneuver which is the hardest of his attacks to dodge. But few times I even died to the Slug, the first miniboss of the stage. I’m hoping that’s just my brain feeling tired. I’ll return to it during the weekend. And then I guess I’ll start doing full runs again.

I found out you actually can increase your credits in the game (through co-op play), so my earlier comment about how the credits turn into lives when you start aiming for the S-rank clear isn’t quite true. Ah well.

My story is this.  The Void Quest dungeon caused me a game over two times.  The first time, I killed myself by having Hama (doom spell) reflected onto me from the Strength Beetles.  That really stunk, so I didn’t play for nearly a month.  Picked it up again and got to the 7th floor, where the enemies get a little bit harder.  I was a little cocky and fought a few more battles when I should have exited and lo and behold, I get ambushed and the main character gets pummeled to death without a chance to escape.  That also sucked, but after that point a vendetta formed for me against this dungeon.  I would see it out for what it did to me, me and my people.

So yeah, I picked it up again last week with careful attention not to game over yet again.  And thusly I progressed.  Got to the top floor where the boss was and decided to try to take him out.  This boss was really peculiar, I thought.  It takes two forms.  The true form is a disgruntled looking baby with an overly large head that has a tip that resembles the shape of dispensed ice cream.  Well, the head has a tip… is the point *shrug*.  It’s other form is an enlarged 8-bit-esque sprite.  He begins the battle with the 8-bit Hero form which he will attempt to rebuild after its destruction. It attacks with dragon quest styled menu windows, it’s kind of adorable.

persona4

As soon as I crushed the hero form, a chain of attacks from the baby killed my main because he hit Kanji’s weakness with Garula.  Then, I tried again which was a painstaking 30 minute battle that resulted with my main falling from Ghastly Wail, an attack that instant KO’s party members with the Fear status.  Doh!  I was… kind of close.  So, what else could I do?  I had one more rainy day before the fog settled so I leveled up my party a bit, the winning factor for this leveling up being that Yukiko learned Mediarama, a better all-heal spell.  Third time was the charm and I got finally got ‘em, and the baby fell from his levitation and promptly became oddly charred.  Odd because earlier in this dungeon there are enemies that resemble charred babies, except with flowers on their head.  That kind of spooked me, a little… a little.

The whole motif seemed to click a little more to me than the others for the dungeons.  Ascending each floor, you hear ‘the boss’ speaking arbitrarily about a game.  The motif was that it was a mockery dungeon-crawling game within a game.  It seems he was addicted to games or something.  The fact he was a levitating baby may suggest that life is a game to him.  Then I wondered to myself and wondered “Gee, have I been playing too much? Too many games?”  I digress.

I get so full of myself playing the game sometimes, plowing through battles and what not, brushing off battles as mostly easy.  But the heat really started to advance in this dungeon.  I find myself taking more caution in battles, carefully examining the possibility of a game over.  So painful to Game Over sometimes.

University has started again and I have close to no time playing Garegga. Nevertheless, I try to play for an hour in the evenings and effectively planning my weekend. I’m quite confident about getting a G now, it’s just a matter of time.

 

The flamingoes: I stopped playing Garegga years ago, when I was still using Iron Makerel, solely because of these damn birds. Then I found a consistent strategy to get 2,4-2,5mill everytime with using Gain and now, with the suicide game over technique in my hands, it’s back to random frustration again.

I got 3,4-3,5mill a couple of times, with a score like that, I’m even allowed to do numerous mistakes later on, unfortunately I usually get like 2,9mill. Stuff that makes the game over technique easier and raises the chance for 3mill+ scores:

 

-Try to destroy the stage 1 boss’ front propeller. It’s difficult to do, I go the safe route with a double suicide on him. This way you can aim for 600k+ scores after stage 1 (my best is 654k atm).With around 600k you respawn faster at the flamingoes since you get the extend earlier. This is crucial, because you want to throw your first bomb after resurrection as soon as possible.

-It’s important to exactly know when to stop shooting to let one enemy live. The enemies seem to appear random, which means that if you stop shooting and the enemy is appearing on the very right of the screen, you’ll going to lose a lot of points, because you first have to wait for him to fly over and THEN drop the bomb.

-Placing the first two bombs is very important aswell. I still don’t have a feeling for the ideal placement yet. After the second bomb you should immediately ram into the enemy. At this point, it comes in handy, if you had a good stage 1 or not. If your stage 1 score was only 500k-550k, you first have to wait 0,5secs before killing yourself.

-After your resurrection you should keep an eye on the big bomber item. It often hides behind the explosion from your last bomb. While trying to collect the item, you’re allowed to drop one bomb. If you are to slow collecting the bomber item, because it’s not visible or even thrown offscreen and you can’t use the big bomber item as your second bomb, you’re going to lose a lot of points.

-After your resurrection, you have to drop three bombs in total. The sprite limit sometimes doesn’t allow a third dropped bomb, again, if this happens, big point loss. The sprite limit seems to be expired sooner the later you try to drop the bombs. Hammer the B button, as soon as you resurrect! If you didn’t ram into the enemy early enough, you now can’t drop a third bomb. Another reason why you need around 600k from stage 1…

-The placement for the latter three bombs is quite straightforward for once. You can just throw them on one spot alltogether.

 

…and even if you did everything correct, you sometimes get 500k less, just because the flamingoes hate you.

 

On another note, my Saturn froze during stage 6 boss the other day with a D,2 score and still a lot of milking to go. Would’ve been around D,5, which would’ve been perfect for a G.

OH WELL

S-ranked Mission 5 yesterday and played two runs today. I seem to average two S-ranks per run and I keep finding new, inventive ways to die. Basically small things that happen rarely but are fatal if you haven’t taken them into consideration. In Mission 1, right before the boss with the bees that carry you off, I was picked up by one right between the two metal bars you hang from, and upon flaming the bug fell right off the screen. In the second run one of those small bugs the boss’ first form releases managed to get through my grenade barrage and hit me. In Mission 4 my normal “Flame the backpack from below”-approach went perfect up to the point where a missile hidden behind the backpack hit me right after I had begun moving away, thus directing my protective flame elsewhere. Mission 5 would’ve been perfect if I hadn’t ran into a spider while flaming a propeller out of the way. Did this on both runs actually, never had much of a problem with it before. And so on. They’re all easily avoidable, so now I should be prepared for these particular incidents.

Anyhoo, the first run ended at Mission 6 boss. I had learned enough of the (awesome-looking transformer) copter to defeat him easily. For the second run I decided to take advantage of the Konami code, get me 30 lives and open up Mission 6 in Practice mode. This was an excellent  idea as I certainly would’ve needed to start taking blood pressure meds had I tried to do it the proper way. One of Mission 6 boss’ forms (the blob) took waaaay too many lives before I even figured out how to hurt it, and quite a few more while I did the hurting. In the end I managed to clear the whole game (with 0 lives left) and open up both Mission 6 and Final Boss Battle in Practice mode, even though I averaged only B-rank. All the FAQs say you need at least average A-rank for the Final Boss Battle to open in Practice mode , but I’m not complaining.

The next step, of course, is to practice these two until I can S-rank them both. The idea of S-ranking the whole game on a proper run doesn’t feel impossible, just really hard but something I should be able to do if I just keep playing.

I do like what Konami did with the lives and credits. When you start aiming for All S-rank the credits effectively turn into lives. At this point my Hit Rate for any stage is 100%, anything below that is the result of a death. But since one can Retry a Mission at any time from the Pause menu and it will not affect the final ranking, it’s possible to make three mistakes and still finish the game with S-rank. That’s pretty nice.